This week's problem comes from Anna Leigh who wants some assurance that it will get better after divorce.
Welcome to Friday Flip on the Becoming You Again podcast. Every Friday I take your divorce problems, conundrums and questions and do a quick flip around to empower you to show up as the best you after divorce.
Today I help Anna Leigh as she needs some assurance that it does get better after divorce, and what to do when her family doesn't really know how to support her right now.
I remember wondering the same thing - will it ever get better after divorce? Listen in as I walk you through how you can know for yourself that it will get better and what to do when your family doesn't understand what you're going through.
If you're done hoping that family will understand, and wishing that life was better now after divorce, then you need to schedule your free consult with me by clicking here. You can start making your life better now, and it all starts with you taking this first step and talking with me to find out how.
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Full Episode Transcript:
Welcome to Friday Flip on the Becoming You Again podcast. Every Friday I take your divorce problems, conundrums and questions and do a quick flip around to empower you to show up as the best you after divorce.
This week’s question comes from Anna Leigh. Hi, I’m new here. She says, I just got divorced in December. I was married for six years and I am a little frustrated with where I am at because it feels like I am never going to get better. Every time I feel like I am getting better and I feel okay with where I’m at something else hits. My ex-husband is constantly wanting to get back together and we had done counseling but I finally just got tired of feeling like I was last place to him and never good enough and I left after I found out he was cheating once again. I just need someone to tell me that it’s going to get better. My family is supportive but I’m the only one in my family that has gotten a divorce so I just feel like they don’t get it so can you please help?
Anna Leigh, I want you to know that first of all you are in a transition period of your life right now and it is going to feel uncomfortable for a little while and that’s okay. I don’t want you to get discouraged that it feels uncomfortable because uncomfortable doesn’t equal hard. It doesn’t equal anything terrible. It just equals change. When you feel a little uncomfortable in what is going on in your life right now during this transition it truly just means that you are going through a change. It sounds to me like you lived a lot of years putting yourself last in the relationship and now that you have stepped out of that role and you have realized that you’re worthy and valuable, it’s going to feel a little strange because you’re not used to loving yourself in that way. You are going to get to a place where loving yourself feels really amazing and it feels really great but it is going to take some practice. So in other words, yes, it will get better. Be willing for it to be a little uncomfortable for a while as you transition.
And I want to say that as far as your family goes, they probably don’t get it. If none of them have been divorced they don’t understand what you are going through. Maybe just give them the benefit of the doubt right now because it is possible that they truly are trying to show up and support you in the best way that they know how and because they have never been through a divorce they don’t necessarily know exactly what you are looking for or what you need and maybe that could be a conversation between you and your family members if that is something you want to address. But I promise you that the more you can lean into it being a little uncomfortable and the more you can lean into growing the love for yourself the better it will start to feel as you move through this transition. You’re in the exact place you’re supposed to be right now and I promise you it does get better. Thanks Anna Leigh for that question.
That’s your Friday flip! Stay tuned for the weekly podcast episode that comes out every Monday. And remember if you want more one on one help from me as your divorce coach to help you create an even better life than when you were married, then you need to schedule your free consult with me by going to www.karinnelsoncoaching.com Remember that’s Karin with an ‘I’.