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Ep #72: The Power of Gratitude | Becoming You Again Podcast

Going through something that’s challenging in your life, like a divorce, makes everything around you seem consumed by that challenge. It can become really easy to think that everything is surrounded by hurt, negativity, and spiraling overwhelm. You may have to work harder to find the goodness in life.

Using thankfulness and gratitude as a grounding practice to help you recognize what is good about your life can be a powerful practice. In this episode you'll learn my top 5 there is power in gratitude and how developing a practice of gratitude, if only for moments here and there, will help you have a more full, expansive life.

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I know what it feels like to second guess every decision, even small ones like what to have for dinner. I've been that mom who cries herself to sleep after divorce because I'm so worried that I've made terrible decisions that have ruined my kids' lives and that I just don't have the capability to know what are the 'right' decisions and what are the 'wrong' ones. If you can relate to this, then you need to come work with me. Since my divorce six years ago I've learned the tools and techniques needed to make decisions confidently and to trust myself to know what's best for me and my kids. I can teach you how to build that confidence in yourself as well, so being confused about what to do in your life will be something that you used to do. Schedule your free consult by clicking here.

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Full Episode Transcript:

I’m your host, Karin Nelson and you’re listening to Becoming You Again, episode number 72.

Welcome to becoming You Again. The podcast to help you with your mental and emotional wellbeing during and after divorce. This is where you learn to overcome the trauma of your divorce by reconnecting with yourself, creating lasting emotional resilience and living a truly independent life so your life will be even better than when you were married. I’m your host Karin Nelson.

Welcome back to the podcast. Since this week in America it’s the week of Thanksgiving, I thought that I’d do a podcast episode about the power of gratitude. Being thankful is something that we’re taught from the time we are little kids. Right? One thing that every little kid learns is to say thank you when someone gives them a gift or does something for them. Please remember to say thank you. Let’s write a thank you note. Let’s make sure and say thank you. Right. And I remember growing up my parents teaching that we should be thankful for what we have. My parents really worked very hard to provide for us and we didn’t have like an overabundance of things or an overabundance of money when I was growing up. But we did have a house that I felt safe in. We always had what we needed. Sometimes we had the things that we wanted that were important us. Growing up I always had a sense of sufficiency that I would always have everything that I needed and I was taught to be grateful for that and I think that was a beautiful thing that my parents instilled in me.

I think when we go through something challenging in our life, like a divorce, it can become really easy to be consumed with that challenge. It can become really easy to think that we are only surrounding by hurt, and negativity, and spiraling overwhelm and when we are in those moments, when that is really where most of our focus is, you might have to work a little harder to find the goodness in your life. But this is what I really want to teach you with this podcast in general is that being intentional about where you put your mental focus, it really is important. And that maybe when you’re going through something challenging that’s when you need the intentionality in thoughts the very most.

And using thankfulness and gratitude as a way to ground yourself in the present is a really great way of being intentional with your thoughts. Now don’t get me wrong here. I’m not saying that you have to stay constantly in positivity or you should never feel negative emotion. Or if you are going through something heart you should always look on the bright side. That is not at all what I am saying because I think when we try and do that with our lives, when we try to put a Band-Aid of positivity over something that really is negative and challenging that that is quickly becoming toxic positivity in our lives and that is not at all what I want you to be learning or taking from this podcast episode where we are talking about gratitude and we are talking about thankfulness. It’s like trying to put a spin on something that is so difficult and you just pretend like you’re being positive. Like I said it’s like putting a Band-Aid over something that really needs more focused and more attention to create the healing around it. That’s not what we are trying to do when it comes to gratitude and thankfulness.

So what I hope that you’ll take from this episode is this idea that gratitude is a practice and it’s a state of mind that you can get better at. If you can begin to adopt this practice of gratitude in your life, even if it’s only for a few minutes a day or only a few minutes of week, your life will be impacted in a beautiful way.

It’s not a secret that there is something very powerful about gratitude and about being thankful. This is something that has been taught for thousands of years all over the world, in all religions, all cultures. Before I really jump into EU with my top five reasons of being grateful I wanted to share a few of my very favorite quotes about gratitude that I think are powerful reminders of the importance of gratitude. And you have probably heard these and if not write them down, hang them up, whatever you want to do. They bring meaning to my life when I think about gratitude in this way and I think they are beautiful reminders. But if you have one that you love I would definitely say hold on to it and remind yourself of it in those moments when you really need it.

So Oprah said, “Be thankful for what you have; you’ll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you will never, ever have enough.” I totally agree with that statement.

Tecumseh is quoted as saying, “When you arise in the morning give thanks for the food and for the joy of living. If you see no reason for giving thanks, the fault lies only in yourself.” And that’s really one of the main things that I teach you guys is to really be in control of what it is that you actually can control which is always yourself, your thoughts, your feelings, your actions. Right. And I feel like that quote from Tecumseh is really encompassing that whole idea.